Minimalism

Through what feels like a random series of events, I have been introduced to the concept of minimalism. Now, I've seen some blogs on extreme minimalism and have watched some youtube videos of tiny houses, and this is way beyond my hopes. I feel claustrophobic just watching that! But, pairing way down is definitely my goal. I don't have a moral/political motivation right now like environmentalism or a rejection of consumerism. I don't have any particular theoretical motivation at all. What I have is a need to feel less overwhelmed in my life in general. I struggle with concentration and take adult ADD medication. I find my messy living space a difficult environment for focusing. But maintaining a clean space might be much easier if I didn't have as much stuff. There's no place for it in my NY apartment. When I had 1600 sq feet in Atlanta, it was easier to ignore. I'm in 650 sq feet here, which I think New Yorkers consider sizable. I'm trying to change my thinking about, for instance, the size of my office. It's ridiculously small in my mind. But, maybe it's just small for the amount of stuff in it. Let's see if that can change...

Writing

I think writing should be a four letter word. I hate writing. I have never enjoyed writing. I know some people who think of writing as an artistic outlet, similar to drawing, painting or sculpting. I personally see no connection. I see much more similarity, in my experiece of writing, to hurtling china plates agains a brick wall. Demolishing china might actually be more fun, though. At least something happens and it's quick and instant. My writing is more like the tires on a heavy old car attempting to pull out of thick wet red clay mud in the south. It's messy, frustrating and sometimes feels impossible. So what kind of career have I chosen? One which requires constant writing.

I'm good at the face to face portion of my career. Really good. And I'm good at being open to constantly learning and striving. I am not good at writing. And that's not completely true, because when I do write, and struggle and thrash about on paper, it does end up becoming pretty good. But I do not find any pleasure in the process. I find continuous surprise at myself that I have been able to do it once it's done. Any tips for finding pleasure in writing? Any other career ideas (other than the inevitable culinary school)?

Ash Wednesday mug shot

It's been two years since I've posted on here, but tonight seems as good a time as any to post. It's Ash Wednesday and I find significance in receiving ashes on my forehead to start the introspective time of Lent. Wednesdays are very full days each week and I couldn't make it to a church today to get Ashes, but I found two amazing things when I arrived home tonight at 8:30:

1. The Roman Catholic church across the street from my apartment had doors wide open so I could see that it was finishing its spanish language mass. I got in line for ashes and, as my head was pushed back with the weight of his thumb, the priest charged me to "Repent and believe in God."

2. An ice cream truck had the bright idea to park right at the base of the church front steps, so that folks might be able to buy a sweet treat just before giving them up, or go ahead and be the first to break their fast.

Amazing.